At a foundational level, I believe that you deserve the opportunity to master your life. We should all get to a place where we can be truly satisfied with our lives.
One of the simplest ways I can help you maximize your life is through a framework called The G.R.O.W. Process. This is a four-step system for transforming your life based on what I learned from one of my first mentors, Steve Myrick. He was a man who saw himself in me and poured his wisdom and experience into me to help me get out of homelessness and into health, wealth and fulfillment.
G.R.O.W. – A Framework to Master Your Life
G.R.O.W. is an acronym, with each letter representing an individual step in the 4-step process for life transformation. The four steps are:
- G = Gain Perspective
- R = Recognize & Remove Roadblocks
- O = Organize a Plan
- W = Work Your Plan
Next, we’ll break down each of these steps in detail.
1. Gain Perspective
Perspective is the process of viewing every area of your life from multiple angles to get a complete picture. I’ve discovered that the more viewpoints I use to understand the critical areas of my life, the clearer my vision of the way forward and next-action steps becomes. In other words, the more you understand your current situation, problems, and struggles, the more likely you are to find solutions to any problems you’re having in your life.
Here are a few additional questions to consider to gain perspective:
- Where am I today in each of the 8 Pillars of Life?
- Who was involved in how I got here?
- What are the patterns in my choices?
- Why am I making these choices?
- Why am I really making these choices?
- Do I have enough perspective to view things correctly?
- Who can I trust to give me a reliable outside perspective?
- What skills am I lacking?
- Who can teach me what I need to know to move forward?
To gain clarity on a focused direction going forward, use the questions of discernment:
- Where does something feel like it’s missing?
- What feels confusing to me?
- How is my life stacking up against my heroes?
This last question is especially important to master your life because our minds often play tricks on us using beliefs, biases, and lies. These are often the anchors that hold us down from making progress. After you’ve answered my questions above, the next most important questions are:
- Where do I want to go (in each of the 8 Pillars of Life)?
- Who can help me get there that is trustworthy?
- What steps may be needed?
- How can I measure my progress?
- What will it feel like when I arrive?
In answering this last question, creating a personal vision using all 6 senses (the 6th sense is instinct). In asking all these questions about you, don’t forget to consider how your actions are affecting those around you. It’s never a bad idea to consider what the most noble thing is for others as well as yourself.
2. Recognize & Remove Roadblocks
We base our lives on the repeated principles, fundamentals, and biases we’ve shaped over time, and we call this a worldview pattern. A worldview pattern is nothing more than a repeated way of thinking, acting, and reinforcing that led you to this point in your life. We have a tendency to develop harmful patterns of thinking in our lives, and harmful actions that don’t take us to where we want to go. To master your life, you need to challenge your worldview pattern.
The roots of harmful patterns are roadblocks. Examples could be a past behavior we received from a parental figure or traumatic experiences in the past. These things cause you to put up barriers, but often these barriers don’t truly serve you. They’re coping mechanisms that hold you back and blind you to the true problems you’re facing.
We all have struggles and blind spots in many places in our lives. If you think you don’t have any, then look at your life. If you’re not exactly where you want to be, then you have roadblocks holding you back!
Roadblocks often reveal themselves in the following ways:
- Traumas – These can be Emotional, Physical, and Spiritual.
- Triggers – Emotional struggles that appear to come without warning and seem to be uncontrollable. These could include avoidance, people pleasing, indecisiveness, losing your temper, becoming irritable or feeling overwhelming anxiety, sadness or fear.
- Denial – The worst lie you can tell yourself is that you do not need growth, change, or forward progress. Those who struggle with denial often project their insecurities on others and constantly blame everyone else for their troubles. They believe that they don’t need to grow or change because they believe their situation was not caused by them. For people like this, their lack of accountability will hold them back. In the end you will always be the one responsible for your life, and I find that when I am regularly taking responsibility for my environment, it gives those around me the inspiration and permission to do the same. Like the hero in almost every movie, the someone must take the first faithful step.
- Unresolved Conflict – If you have a constant problem-area that you always think about, then it is not resolved. When we have an unresolved thought or idea surrounding a hurtful event, it will continue to resurface when you least expect it or want it. To resolve a conflict, you have to redeem it. One of my favorite moments of Transform U Live is when hundreds of people finally have their “ah-ha” moment. It’s the moment when you become ready to move past these hurtful events permanently.
- Attitude – Nothing is more powerful to master your life than your attitude. You can have all the teaching in the world but have an unhealthy mindset and you’ll never move forward. Have you ever noticed that those who expect bad things always tend to find them? I used to be like that, and I struggled for years with that tendency. Then I found a way to fix it within a matter of hours and my life has never been the same .
- The 7 Enemies of Identity – There are seven areas in which self-doubt, self-esteem, and self-value reveal themselves. To learn more, click here.
- Toxic Relationships – I mentioned earlier that staying connected with these types of people steal from your very essence. Toxic Relationships will make you feel that you could never have another person. They also convince you that there is no one else who would love or value you. I have a lot more to say about toxic relationships, but for now I’ll just say this: if there’s anyone in your life that is taking advantage of you or making you feel like you need them, they are toxic and you need to get as far away from them as you can.
3. Organize a Plan and Life Script
One of the biggest reasons we become stuck is because we let our emotions dictate our choices. We need to take the time to develop a specific plan for gaining ground in every area of life in order to overcome impulse on a regular basis. I call this type of plan a life script. A life script must have a few very intentional key components to be useful.
A Life Script Must Include:
- Defined Clear Objectives – Include goals, a vision, and a finished outcome in detail. Again, use all 6 senses.
- Roadblock Removal – There needs to be an actionable plan to move past traumas, triggers, self-doubt, and esteem issues.
- Maximizing Talents & Gifts – We must get clear on what are unique gifts are and lay out a plan to use them regularly. Failing to do so removes any opportunity to receive fulfillment and actualize what we most value. It may not be necessary to exercise your gifts in your career. However, you must apply your gifts through a hobby, service to others, or other creative outlets.
- Identification & Implementation of Guides & Co-Stars – To master your life, you’ll need a guide to help you see and overcome blind spots. They need to be trustworthy and should be where you want to end up. They also must have the authority to question and measure you. Your co-stars are just as crucial to the process. These are people on a similar journey with similar goals. Co-stars make great sounding boards and can offer much-needed encouragement.
- Replenishment Plan – As you move forward, you will run into your old behavior patterns. You will need to develop a habit of taking a step back, resetting your mind and re-evaluating your plan. You will also need rest, and I strongly recommend at least one day a week where you stop and do no work. Your replenishment plan also needs to include the following: a calming place to go and relax, fun activities that refill your tank, friends and mentors who you enjoy and who energize you.
- Measurement of Progress – If you don’t measure your results, you’ll miss the little wins, big wins, and awareness of when you need to make adjustments. You must inspect and correct what you expect. If you fall one day, get up the next day, but above all KEEP MOVING FORWARD.
If the organizing of a life script is a little intimidating, please don’t let this phase scare you. Once you learn how to do this right, it will be easy, and more powerful than you can imagine. If you’re still a little scared of it, join us at the next Transform U Live Event and we will guide you step-by-step through the process.
4. Work Your Plan
One of the reasons I spent so much time struggling is because I never got started making changes. Once you have your plan, you must begin to take daily steps forward. Show yourself some grace when making a mistake, then learn, correct, and start again.
Remember that your plan to master your life is personal to you. That means it’s up to you to take what you’ve learned and apply it. I’ve yet to see one person learn use this framework and fail to get the results. Get up each morning and say, “It’s Time to Work My Plan,” and then do it. Stay resilient through temporary setbacks, and you’ll soon come to learn that you’re stronger than you thought you were and more valuable to this world than you can imagine. All you need to do is decide that you’re done tolerating a life that’s less than what you deserve and commit to the process!
Master Your Life With Additional Tools
The G.R.O.W Process played a huge role in helping me to overcome homelessness and is therefore very special to me. Along with my faith and a few other tools, it changed my life. I know that if you will put it into practice it will do the same for you.
If you are not ready to fully commit to the process just yet, that’s ok. A better first step for you may be checking out our other free resources. We’ll send you more free tools to help you get moving, because we’re more passionate about helping you get unstuck than anything else.